My World Has Fallen...

Crap.

My WORLD has fallen on me.

I don't know if this is a challenge for me to be better from God 

Or is it that I am sabotaged by The Devil.

I am really going bonkers!!!

I feel so stress up now!

So tired.

While I thought everything seems to be better,

idiots things just happened to me.

My laptop just die on me for real this time,

I wonder is I stress or sick or too late then sleep,

I am not sure!

I got the COLD SORE on my mouth again.

I HATE IT!! AGAIN FOR THE THIRD TIME!!!

This shows that I am too worn out.

Why should I experience such things in such a crucial year?

I broke down again today.

Those dreams of him kept going on in my bloody mind every night.

It makes feel me more depressed that why should I get this kind of shit from him.

Heartless man that ruined me.

Yet I miss him so much that while consiously I am not thinking of him,

subconsiously I am thinking of him till like mad that I will dreamt of him.

Help me God.

My frail heart and mind are suffering.

I need miracles.

Shitty shit,

I got so many projects to do,

Now I still got to use my living room desktop.

All the files are gone..

Haiz.

What people said is true.

Once you start to get unlucky,

you will be so unlucky continuously!

I nearly exploded.

I couldn't contain my anger, frustrations and sadness.

Even my laptop has left me and giving troubles to me.

I am left with nothing.

Somehow I felt this way.

I broke down again.

I thought I wouldn't cry anymore,

as I don't have a feeling to cry these few days.

I've failed again.

I just want a simple life,

love by the one that I love.

Be happy,

Graduate,

either work or futher studies,

These goals and dreams seems so far from me.

Why can't the person love me back?

Love has faded.

Gosh,

what is that?

My mouth is gonna suffer for half a month or more!!!

I feel so sick and rotten.

Like a rotten apple that continue to rot and got forsaken.

Once a brightly colored red apple.

I feel so disappointed in so many things.

I can't even describe it.

I can only cry and laugh at myself.

that's all.

How powerless I am.

How useless I am.

Is his love for me is JUST so great?

How disppointing.